Kittens, Cuddles & Ears

Day 116

“Know that miracles are the natural way of the Universe.  Your only job is to move your doubting mind out of the way.”

– Jonathan Lockwood Huie

The Universe is always responding to our thoughts. Yesterday, I came up with the idea to start a tornado-of-kindness. I’ve been thinking and talking with people about what to do to kick-start the campaign today, and the Universe has already responded by giving me the opportunity to perform my first act of kindness.

I’ve had death on my mind for the last few weeks because of my neighbor and Prince. Like most people, I was not too comfortable discussing death, and I didn’t always know what to say when offering condolences to those who had lost a loved one until my own father left his physical form almost seven years ago. That was the most personal and devastating loss I have ever experienced, but it also offered me a rite of passage into that not-so-desirable membership of those who have lost a loved one. Now, I have a much better sense of how to deal with this kind of loss, and what to say when someone else goes through this inevitable experience.

The week my neighbor left his physical form, his daughters and their spouses were here every day to clean out their dad’s apartment. They’ve never really come around before, so I’ve never seen them until now, and they don’t know me at all either. Even still, I wanted to offer some solace to the girls, but I didn’t want to intrude, so I didn’t say anything to them. The week ended, they left, and no one came by at all last week. I felt really bad that I didn’t talk to them when they were here. I had a gnawing feeling inside that I needed to say something to them, but they were gone and that was that.

Then the news about Prince broke and I felt even worse that I hadn’t spoken to the girls. I think I felt that way because it happened so close to home, and I was very affected by the whole thing. I know I would have appreciated it if I were in their shoes because people came out of the woodwork when my dad passed. Although the words are a blur, I remember feeling grateful that so many people offered their support, kind words and sympathetic silences.

My energetic vibration must be pretty strong because I heard someone come to the neighbor’s door today. It was his ex-wife, who I did know because she had been here numerous times before. I was surprised that she wasn’t here a couple of weeks ago, and I was happy to see her today. This was my chance to say something even if it wasn’t to the girls.

I went out to talk to her, and right away I could see that she was shaking and visibly upset. She was piling boxes outside the neighbor’s door. She said she couldn’t bear to go inside but she promised the girls she’d drop some boxes off for them. I shared my thoughts with this grieving woman, who had just finished telling me she had no one left in this world, on how I believe that the spirit lives on, and is always here with us. We spoke for a while, and then she started to get really emotional. She said that the last time they spoke a few weeks earlier, it hadn’t gone well. I gave her a hug, and offered her some comforting words. I tried to reassurance her that his soul is not holding on to any negativity and that I firmly believe that his spirit wants nothing but love and happiness for her.

I told her that I have felt my father’s presence with me at times, and that I believe there are signs when our loved ones are near. I shared my own experience of feeling my dad’s presence when out of the blue, I smelt his very distinct pipe tobacco in the air, where there was no one smoking. I told her that I believe she’ll see signs and feel his presence. My words confirmed something she had experienced earlier in the week and gave her a sense of peace. The instant outpouring of gratitude she showered on me is the most gratifying feeling anyone can experience – I don’t have the words to describe the sense of joy a person feels when they offer a kindness to another for no reason other than to be kind. That was my first tornado-of-kindness act.

Kindness is the language which the deaf can hear and the blind can see.

– Mark Twain

She went on to tell me that she inherited his dog, and one day last week when she was feeling particularly down, she asked for a sign that her lost loved one was here with her. She explained that the neighbor’s dog would lick his owner’s ear at a particular spot every day when he got home from work, and just as she asked for a sign, the dog licked her ear in the same spot. Neon Sign.

A few minutes later, the girls showed up with their spouses and their own two young daughters, so I was able to offer my condolences and share a moment of solace with them after all. Their daughters were intrigued by my cat Ippa, who came out and cuddled with the young girls, to their sheer delight. I’d like to think we made a small difference. I know it definitely made a difference to me.

No act of kindness, no matter how small, is ever wasted.

– Aesop

Thank you, thank you, thank you!