The Rules

Day 75

“Once we accept our limits, we go beyond them.”

– Albert Einstein

I’ve been trying to write a bunch of Diamond Girl series posts for the last several days. I’ve written 4 drafts, they are well written, have a lot of colorful detail, and will keep you at the edge of your seat, but I haven’t been able to finish them because I don’t know what my point is, other than to share anecdotes about my trials and tribulations in the pursuit of marriage with you. I feel like I need to tie it into my life today, and offer my readers a take-away for their own lives, and talk about what my thoughts and beliefs were that created my experiences as they unfolded, and find the positive in it. I don’t have those answers. It’s making my brain hurt.

In yesterday’s post, I shared some of my favorite Einstein quotes, and ever since, the little voice in my head keeps replaying the quote above. I don’t consciously know why, but I am very aware of this re-occuring thought playing in my mind.

The thing is, I do know. I know all of it.

You have all the answers within. Your subconscious is your master database, holding all the thoughts, memories, beliefs and experiences you’ve ever had, ready to bring forward whatever information you desire. You simply need to allow it.

I’m not allowing the answers to come forward. I’m obviously not ready to access them consciously yet. If I do, I might find out something about myself that I don’t want to know. Hmm. Maybe it’s better that I save those introspective thoughts for another forum, and keep my tone here light and humorous.

Last night, I tried to work on the posts again, to no avail, so I switched gears and decided to read. I opened my book to where I left off a few days ago, and read the exact same concept as Einstein’s quote above, almost verbatim. The author went on to say that he wanted to share his personal experiences in his book, and cited Mark Twain in agreement when he said “I don’t want to hear about the moon from a man who has not been there”, indicating that his writing wouldn’t hold credibility if he didn’t have first-hand experience on the topic he was writing about.

This morning, I took another crack at it, and got nowhere. Procrastinating, I decided to pick out some of my affirmation cards to publish on social media, and my If You Do, Others Will Too Accept Your Flaws card stood out like it was lit up in sky lights.

And then a light went on. Mark Twain’s words clicked – I’ve been stalling with the Diamond Girl posts because I believe that I’m not qualified to offer a take-away on arranged marriage since I didn’t get married. I believe that I won’t be credible until I’m married. I’ve had these beliefs for a long time. Years ago, while I was still going through the process, everyone I knew told me I should write a book about it, after all, I was already the go-to person for advice and tips on what to do, and what not to do, with respect to online dating because I had so much experience on the topic. I should have written the book then, but I didn’t because I was waiting for my happy ending.

Now here’s where it all comes together in perfect synchronicity. My dating experiences, my message of positivity, my belief that we create our own reality with the law of attraction…If you’ve read anything about how to manifest the life of your dreams using the LOA, you know that the first step is to figure out what you want, and the easiest way to do that is to know what you don’t want.

I’m pretty clear on what I don’t want, in this case what not to do. And like the author of the book I’m reading said, personal experience equals credibility. Aside from my extensive experience with online dating and the pursuit of a suitable marriage partner, my BFF is my ex-boyfriend. Sure, I didn’t marry him, but we have a relationship that lasted beyond romance for 18 years and counting. If that’s not cred for knowing how to navigate the sticky world of romance, I’m not sure what is.

So, I’m actually the perfect person to give advice on dating and matrimony. People who didn’t go through this process don’t know what it’s like to sift through the new and relatively unchartered field of online dating. I’ve got the equivalent of a black belt on the topic. I do have credibility. 

My underlying belief has finally surfaced! Now I can let it go. I can accept that I am not married, and it’s not a qualification to talk about my experiences.  Now maybe I can move past it.

Thanks Einstein. Literally! 🙂

As I had this thought, I was struck with an idea on how to share my experiences in the pursuit of matrimony and offer insights, in a humorous way, with a positive message, on my blog.

Your subconscious uses your prevalent thoughts and beliefs to create an outer world that reflects your inner one. When you accept your limitations, you clear the blockages in your mind that your subconscious has to take into consideration in creating your world.

I’ve been too critical of myself, thinking that I couldn’t give my experiences a voice because of a silly belief. When I finally looked at what was stopping me, and accepted what I thought my limits were, I got past it. I’ll share my first Diamond Girl Series Rule tomorrow.

Accept your limitations. Once you do, they will go away. It’s the rule.

Thank you, thank you, thank you!